In the time since I wrote exploring my Catholic roots. I have returned to the Catholic Church. It has been an interesting process for me as a gay man married to another gay man. As a natural born hedge witch, it has been interesting on another level as well. How do you make the various parts of who you are or at least who you see yourself as being, sing together so that you become the very best you, you can be?
The first question was and to a certain extant remains the primary. How does a gay married man integrate into an institution that says in its teachings and practises that I am “intrinsically disordered”? For myself the struggle continues. I personally believe that I am called to be the agent of change I wish to see in the Church. For Catholics the Church is two things. It is her members and it is the organization with all of its many rules and rites. It is the latter that at this point in history and place that doesn’t recognize the hand of God in my relationship or in my marriages sanctity. More Catholics than ever believe that the Church should recognize and to an extant celebrate GLBT marriages. I’m ok with were the Church is at because, she is working her way towards a more perfect union with Christ. She has at times taught as part of the catechism certain things that she later changed directions on through the eternal workings of the Holy Spirit. I have Fr. John J O’Neil to thank for helping me to work things through.
As to the whole question of how does a natural born Hedge witch return to Catholicism. This answer for me lives in the last paragraph, the Holy Sprirt. I have found in my return a richness and deepness that was not there before. i see in the Rites and Sacraments a lot of what I saw as truth as a Hedge witch. It reminds me of Romans chapter 1, which incidentally is usually used as an anti-gay reference but which is a call and an appeal to Pagans at the time to See the God who made All things that S(He) is much much bigger the Creation.
The rituals in paganism and the Sacraments in Catholicism at least from these eyes are very similar. The Church in Vatican II declared that the Church is the more perfect vehicle of God on Earth and to that I agree. She is not perfect at this time, she is working her way towards that. Other religions, beliefs and ideas contain Truth and should be celebrated to the extent that they draw everyone Closer to God, who is always yearning for us to be close. There has always been a deep yearning for closeness to God since I can remember and this journey has led me along many paths, it continues to do so. I’m grateful to God for S(He) for all of my experiences, the pleasant and not so pleasant ones alike as they have all led to a more closer union with Him.