You know you're a Seattleite

I’m passing this on from www.theseattleite.net because its soo true and really amusing. Having not lived there for almost a year now I am really beginning to appreciate almost all things Seattle with the one large and semi-perpetual exception being the overwhelming near constant greyness . Living in L.A. has turned me into a sun addict. Just the idea of cloudy and I get a vitamin D deficiency. BTW, I’m wondering if there isn’t some sort of connection between Seattles latte loving coffee culture and the whole lack of sunlight thing.

Whether you’re a true-born native or an import who’s got that Seattle-lovin’ feeling, you may not feel like we’re obvious to the rest of the world, but the following list of traits – if you’ve got ‘em – are conspicuously Seattle.
You don’t carry an umbrella when it rains. Yeah, I know this one’s obvious, but it’s also terribly true. You probably own an umbrella or three, but when the forecast calls for rain, you grab your waterproof shell instead. Or just deal with it.

  • You’re polite, but not friendly. Seattleites won’t like this, but I can see the non-natives nodding. I had to have this one explained to me a few years back, but after hearing the explanations, I see how true it is. We pride ourselves on scooting aside in crowded spaces, not cutting in line, saying ‘please’ and ‘thank-you,’ and even being too nice to ask the cellphone yeller in the next seat to zip it. But warm we are not. Next time you’re on the bus, notice how quiet it is – the only chatterers are the tourists.
  • You’re socially flaky. I started you off gently, but this point and the one above are our true Achilles’ heel. Last time you got an Evite, how long did it take you to reply? Did you even reply at all? If you inadvertently leave your host(ess) guessing as to your attendance, you’re a true Seattleite. 
  • You don’t jaywalk. You just can’t bring yourself to do it. Next time you find yourself Downtown at a no-walk signal, look around at all the other walk-light abiders and know you’re in goodcompany.
  • You’re automatically anti-density. Anther touchy one – but hear me out: die-hard Seattleites love their city just the way it is. The only problem is that small-town-feel-in-a-big-city vibe they love exists only in their minds. If you’re a native, you remember it; if you’re an import, you moved here for that idyllic charm. Let’s get real – Seattle hasn’t been small in decades. Time for a new perspective – take Mercer Island when I-90 was completed: instead of relentlessly saying ‘no’ when resistance was futile, the community took the highway but forced the state into the serious concession of putting a lid on a significant portion of I-90. Can you imagine how awful Mercer Island would be without that lid? Have you ever been to Mercer Island? Get real, Seattle.
  • Recycling comes naturally. Seattleites love to recycle. We get a kick out of correcting those who do it wrong. Natives will remember the slow transition to our current situation as a city of recycling gurus. Remember those green and yellow stacking bins? Love ‘em.
  • You love your neighborhood and have strong biases against others. Close your eyes for a moment and picture these words: Ballard, West Seattle, Fremont, Magnolia, Belltown. Old-time Scandanavians who drive too slow, rabid pro-viaduct folks who never head into Downtown, Solstice Parade – need I say more?, want to be special and separate yet ironically complain loudly when left out of anything, and souless party-animals who mesh uncomfortably with the transient population… See? I’ll even do myself: Wedgwood – super-white Laurelhurst’s less-popular cousin, but hey at least we’re not Lake City right? Oh, and don’t stop the protest of the evil QFC that snatched Matthew’s Red Apple from us!

Thoughts?

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