A few things to bitch about first and then gratitude to be able to bitch. I pulled some muscles in my neck a few weeks back and they are still sore. It is almost comical the way it happened. I was showering and washing my face when I guess I was washing way way too vigorously, and there was this sudden sharp pain. I thought for a moment that I had snapped my neck. I’ve always had problems (since adulthood) with my back muscles. according to her, back problems represent support issues. Who knows. Anyway, my neck has been really stiff now for the past couple of weeks. Maybe I just need new pillows. I guess the only other thing I was going to bitch about is work, or the lack thereof. It’s funny how your self-esteem is so tied up in what you “do” and how much you “make”. I’m technically not unemployed as I have a bunch of things that I do. The problem seems to be that I don’t have those 2000.00 paychecks every 2 weeks anymore. I’ve exhausted my UI benes and so now we live meagerly, though wealthy in Love and all of the more important areas of what Life is really about. I am drawing comfort from my shared employment status with the rest of the country and particularly with Washingtonians, as we seem to have the highest unemployment rate right now, for my type of work.
Ok now that the sweet sweet caffeine is coursing through my brain on to the more positives. There ARE more opportunities for work then there were this time last year. I have a much clearer idea of what I don’t want to be doing and what I can and will do. Mike and I are managing a lot better than most of our friends seem to be (with 2 incomes). I’m happier in general than I have ever been. The past 9 months have been a time of Blessings in spite of the appearances. I have had a chance to put my spiritual beliefs to the test, a chance to live on the growing edge of my beliefs. Work will come in its own time and there is a whole lot of “newness” unfolding everyday. I’ve been able to visit with my Dad for which I’m very grateful, and this time was even more fun than the first visit. I’ve come to appreciate where I live even more. Seattle is really the best place that I could be for right now.